Template:Did you know nominations/Max Greyserman

Max Greyserman

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... that PGA Tour golfer Max Greyserman's mother competed in a golf tournament 13 years after being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis?

Source: "His mom, Elaine, who was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis 15 years ago, competed in the inaugural U.S. Adaptive Open at Pinehurst No. 6 two years ago in the neurological impairment division."

or ALT1:

... that PGA Tour golfer Max Greyserman and his brother Reed are the first brothers to win the New Jersey Amateur Championship?

Source: "Reed and Max are the first set of brothers to win the Amateur in NJSGA history."

or ALT2:

... that a year before golfer Max Greyserman earned his first PGA Tour card, he considered a different career path?

Source: "in 2022, Greyserman briefly considered alternative career paths" and October 2023 article: "Max Greyserman has earned his first PGA TOUR card"

— Preceding unsigned comment added by 2603:7000:2101:AA00:A91E:FA5D:EAB2:D6B0 (talk) 08:56, 20 July 2024 (UTC)

- Reviewed: Masada myth
- Comment: Nominated on behalf of an IP editor who will, as usual, provide the QPQ.

Moved to mainspace by Schwede66 (talk) and 2603:7000:2101:AA00:A91E:FA5D:EAB2:D6B0 (talk). Number of QPQs required: 1. Nominator has 150 past nominations.

Schwede 66 08:39, 20 July 2024 (UTC).

General: Article is new enough and long enough
New enough: Long enough:

Policy: Article is sourced, neutral, and free of copyright problems
Adequate sourcing: Neutral: Free of copyright violations, plagiarism, and close paraphrasing:

Hook: Hook has been verified by provided inline citation
Cited: Interesting:

QPQ: Done.

Overall: 8 of the 16 citations were checked for verification and close paraphrasing; no issues arose. I prefer ALT2 because the focus is on the subject of the article. ALT1 may mention a record being set, but the PGA Tour is more prestigious than the New Jersey Amateur Championship, so I still prefer ALT2. Yue🌙 17:57, 20 July 2024 (UTC)

Unpromoted per WP:ERRORS RoySmith (talk) 15:07, 25 August 2024 (UTC)

Sigh, I forgot to add an icon. The WP:ERRORS discussion was essentially A huge portion of this article rests on sources connected to the subject, like his old university and the PGA and the U.S. Open – WP:RS requires that articles be based on independent sources. Also, a significant portion of the article is WP:PROSELINE statistics, which read really awkwardly and make the article feel half-finished. RoySmith (talk) 18:37, 25 August 2024 (UTC)

@Schwede66: Please address the above.--Laun chba ller 15:32, 2 September 2024 (UTC)

Hello. I will see if I can address Roy's concerns over the next few days. Thank you. 2603:7000:2101:AA00:1979:BEF5:5AEC:99F4 (talk) 20:15, 3 September 2024 (UTC)

Hi Roy. While I have some views as to the difference between league sources and team or self-published sources as to independence, I've made revisions to the article that I hope will address your concern sufficiently. If not let me know, and I will try to do more. And explain what I at least see as the difference mentioned, and why that difference is important to the goal of wp:errors. 2603:7000:2101:AA00:ECDF:78AA:BB1B:9EDE (talk) 04:04, 8 September 2024 (UTC)

Please read WP:PROSELINE to understand the problem with the Amateur career and Professional career sections. @Theleekycauldron: who raised the original issue at WP:ERRORS.— Preceding unsigned comment added by RoySmith (talk • contribs)

Don't think I have much to add; some positive changes in the article, but i'd still like to see a reduction in the non-independent sources. theleekycauldron (talk • she/her) 21:40, 8 September 2024 (UTC)

OK. I'll seek to make some further positive changes to the article along the lines requested to reduce sourcing to league publication. Also, understanding that proseline is an essay, I'll see what more can be done there. 2603:7000:2101:AA00:A13D:8F1E:26A2:8F66 (talk) 09:43, 9 September 2024 (UTC)