Unicorn hunting is the practice by two people who are in a relationship, usually a heterosexual couple, of seeking a third partner for the relationship temporarily or permanently, usually a bisexual—though occasionally, a lesbian—woman, either to join a threesome or to start a polyamorous relationship.[1] The practice is generally viewed negatively by the polyamorous and LGBT community as a form of fetishisation.[2]
Term
editThe term "unicorn hunting" comes from, comparable with the legendary creature, how rare a bisexual woman willing to join an existing couple is, as well as their conditions, which can include relational exclusivity (contrary to open relationships with other people), equal attraction to both partners or interest in only having group sex.[1][3] Likewise, lesbians tend to reject these offers for similar reasons, with their lack of interest in men in addition to that.[4] Its use might have started in the 1970s by swinger communities of the time to describe bisexual women available to have a threesome with a heterosexual couple.[5][6]
Practice
editUnicorn hunting consists of two people in a relationship, usually a heterosexual couple of a man and a woman, seeking a bisexual woman for the relationship, either to join a threesome or to form a polyamorous relationship.[7] A unicorn polyamory is different from a triad or throuple relationship in that in a throuple, the three members are primary partners,[8] while a "unicorn" joins an existing couple. In a triad, rules are usually agreed upon all members, whereas in unicorn polyamory, it is assumed that the couple makes the rules, while the unicorn has to follow them.[5] It usually considers the couple as primary partners and the unicorn as the secondary partner, since if the unicorn consents to joining their existing relationship, the unicorn also accepts their conditions.[1] As such, the practice is seen negatively by the polyamorous and LGBT communities due to the power imbalance in the relationship, and is considered to contribute to the fetishisation of bisexual women.[1][5]
Couples looking for a third partner might do it by using dating apps or websites.[1][9] Vogue India also cited a distinction between "hunters" and "retrievers", where in the latter women find a person for predatory men.[1]
References
edit- ^ a b c d e f Laxman, Shyama (2022-02-23). "Unicorn hunting: How bisexual women are fetishized on dating apps in India". Vogue India. Retrieved 2023-06-17.
- ^ Smith, Molly Grace (December 2022). "Queer enough to swipe right? Dating app experiences of sexual minority women: A cross-disciplinary review". Computers in Human Behavior Reports. 8. doi:10.1016/j.chbr.2022.100238.
- ^ Kedia, Surabhi (2022-04-06). "What is Unicorn Hunting? Everything You Should Know About It". ThePleasantRelationship. Retrieved 2023-06-29.
- ^ "Opinion | Why are there so many straight men infiltrating lesbian Tinder?". NBC News. 2019-09-02. Retrieved 2024-06-24.
- ^ a b c Johnston, Sally W (March 2024). "'You enjoy being a second class citizen': Unicorn dynamics and identity negotiation on subreddit r/polyamory". Sexualities. 27 (3): 577–593. doi:10.1177/13634607221107821.
- ^ Griffiths, Heather; Frobish, Todd S. (November 2013). "Virtual Deviance: Swinging and Swapping in an On-Line Network". Deviant Behavior. 34 (11): 875–894. doi:10.1080/01639625.2013.781448.
- ^ Pincus, Tamara; Hiles, Rebecca (2017). It's Called "Polyamory". Portland, Oregon: Thorntree Press.
- ^ Vaughan, Michelle D.; Burnes, Theodore R., eds. (2022). The Handbook of Consensual Non-monogamy: Affirming Mental Health Practice. Diverse Sexualities, Genders, and Relationships. Lanham, MD: Rowman & Littlefield. ISBN 978-1-5381-5714-5.[page needed]
- ^ Filice, Eric; Johnson, Corey W.; Parry, Diana C. (2 January 2023). "Unicorns on the Digital Range: Bisexual Persons' Experiences of Geo-Social Networking Application Use". Journal of Bisexuality. 23 (1): 50–79. doi:10.1080/15299716.2022.2124214.
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External links
edit- Dagger, Jesse. "To Unicorn Hunters, From an Ex-Unicorn". Polyamory For Us. Retrieved 17 June 2023.
- Dodgson, Lindsay. "What it means for couples to go 'unicorn hunting' — and why it usually doesn't end well". Business Insider. Retrieved 2023-06-17.
- "Why Unicorn Hunting Doesn't Work". Poly Philia. Retrieved 2023-06-17.
- "Unicorn Polyamory". Unicorns Rule!. Retrieved 2023-06-17.