Talk:Muja (alligator)/GA1

Latest comment: 2 years ago by PCN02WPS in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: PCN02WPS (talk · contribs) 05:07, 15 May 2022 (UTC)Reply


Hi there, comments are below and the article is   on hold. PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 05:07, 15 May 2022 (UTC)Reply

Lead and infobox

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  • "and the oldest known alligator in captivity" → reads more naturally as "and is the oldest known alligator in captivity"
  • "Having arrived to the zoo in 1937" → would word this as "Having arrived at the zoo in 1937"
  • I suppose it can be inferred, but his estimating hatching date ("1920s–1930s") given in the infobox is not mentioned in the body of the article.

Life

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  • "he arrived to the zoo" → "he arrived at the zoo"
  • Sourcing gets a little sparse here, after the second sentence. If all of that is sourced to reference 2, you can use the named reference after sentences it supports
  • link "German bombing of Belgrade" to Operation Retribution (1941)
  • link "Allied bombing of Belgrade" to Bombing of Belgrade (1944)
  • "The average lifespan of an American alligator is between 35 and 50 years" → this sentence reads as somewhat choppy compared to the rest of the paragraph and appears slightly out of place; I'd either combine with the sentence after it or add some sort of remark about Muja himself.
    Amanuensis Balkanicus, the points in this section don't appear to have been addressed. PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 15:52, 23 May 2022 (UTC)Reply
    Nevermind, excuse me being stupid. I was looking at an old revision, so of course they don't look like they've been addressed. PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 15:54, 23 May 2022 (UTC)Reply

Health and lifestyle

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  • "He is fed once a week and usually eats between {{convert|5|kg}} and {{convert|6|kg}} of meat." → "He is fed once a week and usually eats {{convert|5-6|kg}} of meat." This simplifies the "convert" code and eliminates repetition of the units; this change also necessitates removal of the word "between" per MOS:RANGE.
  • "Due to his old age, it is difficult for him to hunt for his food. Instead, zookeepers place it right in front of his jaw." → this sounds a little choppy, I'd combine these into one sentence.
  • The quotes from Rakočević are presented sort of like they're in a news article, especially since the first one isn't introduced as such. I think paraphrasing these would read better, or perhaps using only one part of one of the quotes while paraphrasing the rest.
  • Is there a reason he was separated from the alligators from Cuba?

See also

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  • I would perhaps add a quick note after the link to Sami (chimpanzee) briefly explaining its relation to Muja

References and categories

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Thanks for reviewing this, PCN02WPS. I've made the changes you suggested. The source doesn't say why he was separated from the other alligators, but I'm guessing it had something to do with giving him space to recover. I'm also not sure what the best approach would be regarding the decade of birth categories, so I added both. What do you think? Amanuensis Balkanicus (talk) 05:10, 23 May 2022 (UTC)Reply
I think that's a reasonable approach, since there's no way to know which decade is actually the correct one. Well done on the article, I'm happy to give it a pass. PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 16:07, 23 May 2022 (UTC)Reply