Wikipedia

Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Mascarene Martin/archive1

< Wikipedia:Featured article candidates
The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Ian Rose 10:02, 30 March 2013 (UTC) [1].[reply]

Mascarene Martin

edit

Mascarene Martin (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

Toolbox
Nominator(s): Jimfbleak - talk to me? 07:22, 1 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I'm back from three weeks in Far East and Australia, refreshed and ready to present you with yet another obscure African swallow. As with my last FAC, the article is of necessity short because little more is known. Thanks for reading Jimfbleak - talk to me? 07:22, 1 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Image check - all OK (PD-old-100, own work). Sources and authors provided (tweaked tags and author info ). GermanJoe (talk) 09:23, 1 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Hi Joe, thanks for that Jimfbleak - talk to me? 11:01, 1 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Comments. Reads well; just nitpicks for now, but I'll try a lit search soon. Sasata (talk) 21:42, 2 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • "bird in the swallow family which breeds" which->that
  • make sure there's non-break spaces in short-form bi- and trinomials
  • still not a fan of starting paragraphs with "This", or with abbreviations
  • link clutch
  • plumage should be linked earlier
  • link vocalisations
  • "The current Association of European Rarities Committees (AERC) recommended practice" think there should be a hyphen before recommended
  • "separated the Madagascar population" used as adjective, so should be Madagascan (or Malagasy)
  • link subspecies, breeding season, Imerina
  • "wings averaging 116.6 mm (4.6 in)" odd to have such a difference in sig figs; check others too
  • Pemba needs disambiguating (but note that Pemba island is linked shortly after)
  • "21.6 x 15 mm (0.85 x 0.59 )" missing units
  • is there a plain English way of saying Homoptera?
  • "Mascarene Martins will mob the Mauritius Kestrel suggesting that" comma after Kestrel?
  • "The population is unknown" ->population size?
  • "More recent cyclones, like one in 1980" any link for this? (would be hard to believe that we don't have an article about a recentish tropical cyclone!)
  • link introduced
  • EU has not been defined, so maybe just write in full

Lit search. Here's some stuff that came up in a combined search of the Web of Knowledge, JSTOR, and ScienceDirect. I'm sure most of the older sources are superceded by ones you've already used, but I list them here on the off chance some might be useful. Sasata (talk) 23:45, 5 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

List moved to talk now resolved Jimfbleak - talk to me? 06:53, 10 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • I've added the first three, more for historical interest than anything else.
  • The last seven mostly have accessible full text or a good abstract. They are either too general, or concentrate on the endangered forest species. Nothing I can see to add to what's there.
  • I've used Diamond as a reference, but I can't access the Horne chapter. Turner is usually pretty comprehensive on vocalisations, so I doubt if I'm missing much
  • I can't access the Gerfaut article. Given that the Berlioz book is only 80 pages and nearly 70 years old, I doubt whether it's worth trying to obtain.

Source review - spotchecks not done, no comment on source comprehensiveness

  • FN29: formatting
  • FN45: page(s)?
  • FN49: should be et al, and check page formatting
  • Maggs et al: link is broken
  • You might think about specifying state or country for lesser-known publisher locations. Nikkimaria (talk) 19:44, 7 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Thanks for review, refs and link fixed. Publisher locations are optional. I decided against countries because only putting them for "lesser known" is US/UK-centric, adding for all gives abominations like London, UK, or Cape Town, South Africa Jimfbleak - talk to me? 07:04, 8 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]
The Mascarene Martin is a small hirundine that has grey-brown underparts.. - "hirundine" is an odd word to throw at a layperson (a good one, mind you!) - I'd link it or maybe replace with an anglo-saxon word of some sort.....
The Phedina species are members of the swallow family of birds, and are classed as members of the Hirundininae subfamily.. - two "members" in the one sentence - a bit repetitive and surely can be folded down to something like "Birds of the genus Phedina belong to the members of the Hirundininae subfamily within the swallow family of birds" or somesuch....

Otherwise looking ok. Casliber (talk · contribs) 19:39, 12 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

  • I will read the article thoroughly tomorrow, but I'm happy to see that not only extinct Mascarene bird articles are getting some attention! I have made a few edits along the way.
  • At first glance, the synonyms in the taxobox need written authorities and dates. When these are added, I don't think citations are needed there (as in other articles), since the authority listed is already the source.
  • The first external link seems quite redundant. It is a shame that we don't have actual photos in the article, yes, but why then link to another drawing (instead of a photo), if anything? FunkMonk (talk) 03:28, 14 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]
  • Some further comments. The term "nominate subspecies" will seem confusing to non-experts, especially since it is not even established what the scientific name of that subspecies is until the distribution section. I think the scientific names of both should be mentioned under taxonomy.
  • Done
  • Maybe add slight historical context to the two drawings? I'm thinking year and author.
  • Done
  • Thanks for review and support

Spot check

  • 1a and 1c. OK.
  • 2. OK.
  • 5. OK.
  • 6. OK.
  • 8. I can only see the figures, but they seem to broadly confirm the article text.
  • 13. DOI link doesn't work for me, although I can see at www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.2989/OSTRICH.2007.78.1.8.52 that it's correct. The abstract confirms that Brazza's and Banded martins have similar calls.
  • 14. OK.
  • 15. OK.
  • 29 and 30. OK.
  • 35a and b. OK.
  • 40. Peirce et al. call the bird the Malagasy Swallow? If so, shouldn't this alternative name be mentioned in the article? Is it also called the Madagascar Swallow?
  • 42. OK.
  • 50. This might be clearer if, instead of just quoting the translation directly, the effects of the legislation were summarised -- something like "is is illegal to kill any bird of the species or to take or destroy their nests under section 16 of the Wildlife and National Parks Act 1993". Why is "Species of wildlife in respect.." capitalized?
  • 52. Papazoglou seems to say that there is no European level protection on Reunion rather than no protection at all. I don't know what Maggs says.
  • Changed to European-level, although in practice I suspect that this means little effective protection

I did a second image review and source review and found no problems. DrKiernan (talk) 18:07, 26 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
Retrieved from "https://en.wiki.x.io/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Featured_article_candidates/Mascarene_Martin/archive1&oldid=1207931868"