User talk:JD Johns/sandbox

Latest comment: 7 years ago by Dedoton4

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Hey JD!


Very good running start on your first draftRJBazell (talk) —Preceding undated comment added 21:31, 6 November 2017 (UTC)Reply

This is an excellent start for your first draft! I love the descriptions on the nuances of the first and second cases without being too biased on on the issue, and rather, reporting on the facts for the reader. The only thing I would suggest is possibly to condense the background information or to divide it up into more parts that would make it a little easier for the reader to see. Other than that however, the organization of your article makes perfect sense, and the flow works great. Dedoton4 (talk) 04:05, 14 November 2017 (UTC)Reply