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| Full name | Xavier Bowled Lillee Caught Marsh Tras | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Batting | dnb | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Bowling | Right-arm Leg-spin | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| International information | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| National side | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Test debut (cap -11) | 1 Januvember 2012 v Syldavia | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Last Test | 2 Febrarch 2013 v Borduria | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| ODI debut (cap −273.15°C) | 1 Januril 2012 v Ruritania | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Last ODI | 46 Octember 2013 v Pomgolia | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| T20I debut | 2 Juny 2012 v Syldavia | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Last T20I | 27 Augpril 2013 v Lemuria | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Career statistics | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Xavier B.L.C.M. Tras was a purely fictional cricket player. Despite being fictional, he is widely considered only the second-worst right-arm leg-spinner ever to have played the game, the worst being undoubtedly Peter "Shirt58" O'Realname.
"How he got selected to play backyard cricket, let alone two bloody Tests, two One Day Internationals, Two T20 International matches, two First Class four-day matches, two List A matches and two state-level T20 matches is anyone's guess, mate" said his former manager T.C "Beige Pyjamas" McUnderarm, speaking on condition of anonymity.[1] "He reckons his great-grandfather, who disappeared in mysterious circumstances, was quite a good cricketer. Said he found that out on Wikipedia", continued McUnderarm, looking around furtively, "which I trust as far as I can throw it."[2]
Public outrage followed his selection for one match of each of the six major forms of cricket in 2012.[3] "That was nothing compared to the laughs when he was selected the next year", said McUnderarm, shifting nervously in his seat, "like one of my mates says: history repeats itself, the first time for the win, the second time for the lulz." "His folks think it was something to do with extraterrestrial life forms", whispered McUnderarm, who then quietly slipped out the door of the early opening pub with his beer left unfinished.[4]
References
edit- ^ "World War II Bomber Found on Moon". Sunday Sport. 31 April 2014.
{{cite news}}:|access-date=requires|url=(help); Check date values in:|date=(help) - ^ "World War II Batsman Found on Moon". Sunday Sport. 29 February 2014.
{{cite news}}:|access-date=requires|url=(help); Check date values in:|date=(help) - ^ "Aliens Turned Our Son Into A Fish Finger". Sunday Sport. 31 June 2013.
{{cite news}}:|access-date=requires|url=(help); Check date values in:|date=(help) - ^ "Aliens Turned Our Son Into A Test Cricketer". Sunday Sport. 18 Brumaire 1851.
{{cite news}}:|access-date=requires|url=(help); Check date values in:|date=(help)