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Hi, I have read through this very interesting article. It's well written and generally very clear. I have suggestions for improving the text (below). I have not yet checked the sources, but will do so after the nominator has had a chance to respond to my initial comments. Best wishes Mertbiol (talk) 09:52, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply
Thank you for picking it up Merthiol. I really appreciate your reviewing her and look forward to collaborating with you to improve it. SusunW (talk) 13:59, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply
I suggest adding "they" to "and in 1915 they went to Serbia" - as Holme was the subject of the first half of the sentence (not Holme and Haverfield together).
Please change "honored" to "honoured" for British English spelling.
Thank you. I write in AE and then have to try to "Britishise" the text. It's often that I miss a word or two, so I appreciate your second set of eyes. done. SusunW (talk) 14:22, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply
I think you need to add a comma after the first "Serbia" in the final sentence of the second paragraph.
Please rephrase "In 1923, Holme returned to Britain and performing..." (first sentence, third paragraph) - would "In 1923, Holme returned to Britain and began to perform again..." work?
I suggest changing "Her papers are located at the Women's Library..." to "Her archive is held by the Women's Library..." to avoid repetition of "papers" in the final sentence.
In British English, we would generally say "close to her brother Gordon" and not ""close with her brother Gordon".
Interesting. "Close to" in AE is near, and "close with" describes a relationship. Again, I appreciate your help with BE. done SusunW (talk) 14:28, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply
I suggest changing "artist's model, singer and began acting" to "artist's model, singer and actor."
Craig's full name was mentioned at the start of the section. You may need to repeat "Edith Craig" again at the start of the third paragraph.
Unlike the Pankhursts, of which there are several, there is only one Craig mentioned in the article, so to my mind, it is clear who it is, so I've left it. But, I am happy to use her first name if you think it is necessary. SusunW (talk) 14:46, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply
I suggest deleting "forward" in "From this time forward..." (third paragraph, second sentence).
I suggest changing "She adopted masculine dress and mannerisms thereafter, which have been well documented in photographs" to "Photographs indicate that Holme began to adopt masculine dress and mannerisms." (You also need to make it clear that "she" refers to Holme and not to Twisha Singh.)
I suggest changing "continued performing as a male and touring with theatrical companies" to "continued to perform as a male, touring with theatrical companies" (third paragraph, sixth sentence).
I suggest changing "but Holme and Haverfield remained in the territory, refusing to leave their wounded patients" to "but Holme and Haverfield refused to leave their patients" (fourth sentence, first paragraph).
I think "Red Cross" needs a link (final sentence, first paragraph).
Not sure if this was a country-specific organization, so I linked it to the International organization. If that works, done. SusunW (talk) 15:08, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply
I suggest rephrasing "They were joined there by other veterans..." to "There they were joined by other veterans..." (third sentence, second paragraph).
Please remove the Oxford comma after "Greenlees" in "which she, Greenlees, and Ker all supported" (fourth sentence). Oxford commas are not routinely used in British English.
Mertbiol, thank you so much for the review. I truly appreciate your efforts to improve it. Please advise if I need to do anything further or if we need to discuss more. SusunW (talk) 15:34, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply
I have checked the following sources: [1], [3], [4] (see comments below), [5], [6] (see comment below), [7], [8], [9], [10], [11], [12] (see comment below), [14] and [17].
[4] Singh, Twisha (March 2022)
Haverfield married to a wealthy baron - I think this is p12 not p15;
[6] Allsopp, Jenna - I'm not convinced that this source supports "Holme began to adopt masculine mannerisms" (I'm happy that it talks about Holme adopting masculine dress).
Changed to say habits, and added a link to Dimitrijević & Baker p 54 which says "The practices characteristic of the Holme-Haverfield circle, including masculine dress, short hair, practising sports, consuming tobacco, automobility and enthusiasm for auxiliary service in war, correspond to the features of newly emerged sexual identities among women."
[12] Graham, Becky (September 2021) - The source says that Alick and Vera exchanged letters, but does not mention correspondence involving Haverfield and Wray.
Page 92 confirms that Holme corresponded with Alick Embleton and Celia Wray. Perhaps it is better if modified to say "Becoming close friends, Holme wrote letters to Embleton and Wray, particularly during World War I. SusunW (talk) 19:43, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply
Other than the source queries above, I think the article is ready for promotion. I will therefore place the review on hold. Best wishes Mertbiol (talk) 16:24, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply
This is a very interesting and informative article. It is well written and appears to cover all aspects of the life and work of Vera Holmes in detail. Congratulations to @SusunW: for their hard work to bring this nomination forward. I have no hesitation in promoting it to GA status. Great job!!! Mertbiol (talk) 19:46, 30 June 2023 (UTC)Reply