Talk:The Return (Kamaal Williams album)

Latest comment: 3 years ago by Zmbro in topic GA Review

GA Review

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This review is transcluded from Talk:The Return (Kamaal Williams album)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Zmbro (talk · contribs) 17:15, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply


Hey there! I know almost nothing about Kamaal Williams, but I'm bored and this looks like an interesting read so I'll review it for ya! – zmbro (talk) 17:15, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply

Thank you for taking the time. 😃 웃OO 17:28, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply

Infobox and lead

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  • Infobox looks good, but question. Do we have any recording dates/ranges or studio(s) available?
  • ", under his Black Focus Records." → ", under his Black Focus Records label."
  • Link music videos

Background and development

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  • Is there a specific reason the duo decided to break up?
  • "This style was labeled as "jazz fusion"" labeled by whom?
  • Is there a reason Williams chose these specific musicians to play on the record? Or were they just studio ones?
None specified. 웃OO 22:41, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • Asked this in the previous section but do we have any sourced recording dates/ranges or studios available? If not that's fine I'm just wondering.
None available. 웃OO 22:41, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply

Composition

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  • I'm noticing this section is very quote-heavy. I would try to paraphrase a little bit more.

Release and promotion

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  • I'm assuming the tour went ahead as scheduled? Right now it only says it was announced.
They are just announcements. I don't recall finding a whole lot where they indeed performed at such places. 웃OO 22:41, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply

Reception

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  • The lead mentions a summary of reception, stating "some praising the re-creation of jazz-funk sounds of the 1970s, while others questioned the length of certain songs" but that's not present here. I'd make it known in this section as well.
  • Italicize Pitchfork
  • Also noticing this section to be very quote-heavy. I would check out WP:RECEPTION to assist with paraphrasing.
  • I'd add a summary to the start of accolades, such as "The Return appeared on numerous year-end lists in 2018." something like that
  • Just my personal preference, but I would put the refs into their own unsortable col. You don't have to just my preference

Track listing

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  • Are writers available?
None specified. 웃OO 22:41, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • Total length?

Personnel

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  • Looks good

Charts

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  • I'd make the table sortable

References

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  • Copyvio detector is showing a couple violations over 40%. As I stated earlier, I would paraphrase a bit more, as certain sections seem very quote-heavy.
  • I would use the actual titles instead of "AllMusic review", "Pitchfork review", etc.
I changed them all, though "Kamaal Williams - The Return" isn't really that spectacular either. 웃OO 22:41, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • Archive ref 8, 21, and 26
  • Access date for ref 15?
  • Ref 22 is via wayback machine so I'd make sure that url is present.
  • Are there available dates for refs 8, 18, 21, 27–32?
  • Ref 33: is there a url or other info?
there used to be, but it wasn't the wire url. 웃OO 22:41, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • Is Tiny Mix Tapes an RS?
[1] this consensus says it should be. 웃OO 22:41, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • Another question when further reviewing. Is "Piccadilly Records" supposed to italicized? Seeing it that way in the table and ref but in the text it's not. – zmbro (talk) 19:30, 25 March 2021 (UTC)Reply

Final thoughts

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Overall looks good. Gotta be less quote-heavy in some sections and got a few other things to resolve but should be a GA in no time. For now on hold. – zmbro (talk) 17:50, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply

I should have resolved alot of the issues here. I hope the paraphrasing is ok, the rest of the quotes I couldn't do, at least not at the moment. 웃OO 22:41, 23 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
I just addressed those last two issues. 웃OO 23:35, 25 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
Looks good. Happy to  Passzmbro (talk) 18:06, 26 March 2021 (UTC)Reply