Talk:The Jane/GA1

Latest comment: 8 months ago by LEvalyn in topic GA Review

GA Review

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Nominator: Epicgenius (talk · contribs)

Reviewer: LEvalyn (talk · contribs) 04:16, 26 March 2024 (UTC)Reply


Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose ( ) 1b. MoS ( ) 2a. ref layout ( ) 2b. cites WP:RS ( ) 2c. no WP:OR ( ) 2d. no WP:CV ( )
3a. broadness ( ) 3b. focus ( ) 4. neutral ( ) 5. stable ( ) 6a. free or tagged images ( ) 6b. pics relevant ( )
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked   are unassessed

Comments

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I am looking forward to digging into this article and learning about this building! ~ L 🌸 (talk) 04:16, 26 March 2024 (UTC)Reply

  • Thanks for your further revisions! I've taken a look and I'm happy to say that all my concerns have been addressed. I will promote the article to GA shortly. Great work here and thanks for your contributions! ~ L 🌸 (talk) 21:23, 2 April 2024 (UTC)Reply

General suggestions

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Prose

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  • In "Rooms": By 2008, the building had been converted into an upscale hotel with about 200 rooms, although the small dimensions of the rooms remained. Since the building has the same number of rooms as before, it makes sense that the rooms are the same size as before. Maybe revisit to frame differently, eg, it was converted into a hotel which retained the same number and size of rooms? ~ L 🌸 (talk) 05:34, 26 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • Same paragraph, MacPherson added "micro-luxury" features -- who is MacPherson?
  • In "Development and early years", a whole bunch of events are in the pluperfect when it seems like the simple past is more appropriate? e.g., had announced plans, had been hired... why not just "announced", "was hired"?
  • In "Opening and use as a boarding house", there is a close quote with no opening quote -- where does the quote start? the ASFS wrote that the building was intended as a bright, airy, comfortable place to sit without being annoyed by the fumes of liquor or soul-rasping profanity" ~ L 🌸 (talk) 05:34, 26 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
  • In the last paragraph of that section, the one that begins When the eight-story Seaman's House opened nearby..., I find I am having trouble keeping track of which building is which. Is "the building at 507 West Street" the one now known as The Jane? I think this paragraph might be trying to explain that the ASFS Building became a YMCA building, but the references to other nearby buildings is muddying things for me. ~ L 🌸 (talk)
  • The Jane-West Corporation bought the Seamen's House in December 1946 -- this causes me the same confusion as above; the Seaman's House was at 11th Ave, but surely they bought 507 West. I think for clarity the previous paragraph needs to establish one wiki-official name for the building in this period (you will have the best sense of which one is most appropriate, maybe Seamen's House Annex? Or just 507 West Street?) and use it consistently, replacing the more ambiguous uses of the phrase "the building" and "the auditorium" -- and whatever you use there should go at the start of this paragraph too.
  • In the second paragraph of "1940s to 1970s", the whole framing of a "decline" feels like an NPOV issue. I think some substantial reframing is called for here. Maybe cut the first sentence, and start with something like "in the 1970s the hotel gained a reputation for housing criminals and drug addicts, prompting the NYT to write that..." ? It looks like the hotel/area's seedy reputation does get mentioned a lot, but I feel like we can be more neutral about it. ~ L 🌸 (talk) 23:35, 30 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
    • Actually as I am doing the source review, wow, you've done a lot to bring a more neutral tone to the discussion of the hotel's recent past! I think it can still be adjusted/toned down further, but I feel like you should have some praise too for getting here from "fetid flophouse" and "bleak hallways were full of prostitutes and drug addicts"!! (Can't believe this article I'm looking at said all that and then quoted a cook who's lived there for 15 years...) ~ L 🌸 (talk) 23:35, 30 March 2024 (UTC)Reply
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.