Talk:The Client (Star Wars)/GA1

Latest comment: 4 years ago by Hunter Kahn in topic GA Review

GA Review

edit

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Cavie78 (talk · contribs) 20:06, 25 April 2020 (UTC)Reply


I'll take this one Cavie78 (talk) 20:06, 25 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

Lead

  • Think it might be worth stating that he first appears in The Mandalorian in the lead
    • Do you mean the fact that his first appearance is the episode "The Mandalorian"? If you feel strongly I'll add it, but my preference would be not to do so. The first appearance is already covered in the infobox so I think it would be a bit redundant. Also, since he is only in a handful of episodes as it is, I don't know if we need to call the one out by name. (And if we do so, do we then have to mention his last one as well?) Also, leaving it out would be more consistent with how the other Mandalorian character articles are already written. But let me know what you think... — Hunter Kahn 05:10, 2 May 2020 (UTC)Reply

Appearances

  • "informs the bounty hunter than the target" -> "informs the bounty hunter that the target"
  • "in which the Mandalorian returns with the captured Child" Suggest rewording to "in which the Mandalorian brings him the captured Child"
  • "They devise a new plan in which Greef and his ally Cara Dune bring the Mandalorian to the Client as if he is a prisoner, after which they would assassinate him" Think it could be made clearer here that Greef and Mando intend to assassinate the client (it could be read as though Greef and Cara Dune plan to assassinate Mando)
  • "bringing along a transport" think it could be made clearer that this a cot-like transport rather than a ship

Characterization

Filming

  • "Favreau and executive producer Dave Filoni shot scenes for the character both with and without the puppet, so they could replace the character with a CGI effect in post-production if the puppet did not look satisfactory." Replace one instance of "the character" with "the Child"
  • "After Herzog filming a scene with the Child" -> "After Herzog filmed a scene with the Child"

Reception

  • "and has a "unique cadence and screen presence" made him a good fit" -> "and has a "unique cadence and screen presence" which made him a good fit"

Merchandise

  • Ok

Images

  • Look good with appropriate licences

Sources

  • All look good
  • There's a brief mention of Herzog's performance on the BBC website which you may, or may not, wish to include. It states that "It's a hoot to see [The Mandalorian] leaning into a chilly, German-accented character who wears the insignia of the Empire. The Mandalorian doesn't care; he's a mercenary." : http://www.bbc.com/culture/story/20191112-star-wars-show-the-mandalorian-is-difficult-to-care-about
    • Thanks for finding this. I'm not sure it quite fits anywhere; the closest might be adding the "hoot" line to the Reception section, though it's less a statement about the character and more about Mando's interaction with him, and I'm not sure it adds much in any event, so I've left it out for now. — Hunter Kahn 05:10, 2 May 2020 (UTC)Reply

Great article - my concerns are only minor. Placing on hold for now Cavie78 (talk) 10:31, 27 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

Thanks Hunter Kahn My point regarding the lead was simply to say "who first appears in the Disney+ television series The Mandalorian", but I take your point. Thanks for writing such an interesting article, happy to promote