Talk:Seal of Zion, Illinois/GA1
Latest comment: 4 years ago by HAL333 in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: HAL333 (talk · contribs) 03:38, 12 August 2020 (UTC)
I look forward to reviewing this and working with you The C of E. ~ HAL333 03:38, 12 August 2020 (UTC)
- Lede
- You could wikilink bandstand
- Insert "it" after "ruled"
- Original Seal
Scottish Christian evangelist John Alexander Dowie, of the Christian Catholic Church in Zion, founded the city in 1902.
Dowie's relation to this church is vague. From what I understand, he founded that church - could you clarify it? Also, was there a link between the founding of the church and the founding of the city as well?- To make it a little less choppy, you could combine the sentences
The seal used a quartered shield with Christian symbols on it. The shield contained a cross, a dove holding an olive branch, a crown with a scepter with the city name in the shield with the phrase "God reigns" in a banner above it.
into something likeThe seal used a quartered shield which displayed Christian symbols: a cross, a dove holding an olive branch, and a crown with a scepter with the city name in the shield with the phrase "God reigns" in a banner above it.
- That last sentence/clause also uses "with" too often.
- Lawsuit
You could change Sherman felt offended by this
to The Christian symbolism offended Sherman, who demanded...
It's a little more concise and less vague.
The court also found that the "God reigns" banner was also a religious statement that had no secular context.
Remove that second also.
- New seal
By 1994, the police incorporated the new city seal into their decals.
Add "had" before incorporated.
- @HAL333: I have made the amendements you have suggested. As for the court finding line, I think that should be retained because it shows that the court considered each of the elements of the seal rather than just looking at it as a whole. The C of E God Save the Queen! (talk) 06:16, 20 August 2020 (UTC)
Pass Everything looks good now. ~ HAL333 18:04, 20 August 2020 (UTC)