Talk:Rhys Williams (Torchwood)
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GA Review
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- This review is transcluded from Talk:Rhys Williams (Torchwood)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Glimmer721 (talk · contribs) 21:06, 9 May 2012 (UTC)
Will review soon. Glimmer721 talk 21:06, 9 May 2012 (UTC)
Comments:
- "Rhys' role is increased after the second series; actor Kai Owen is given star billing from Children of Earth onwards" - unlink Kai Owen as he was just linked above; maybe explain that Children of Earth was a serial that made up the third sereis
- Done, put in parenthesis.
- "The character has went on" → "The character has gone on"
- Fixed
- "a 2011 BBC/Starz co-production" - BBC doesn't need to be linked again
- unlinked
- Anwen is linked in the plot summary section, but not the intro
- linked in intro too. Also linked Gwen in first section of summary for consistency.
- "a contrast to Torchwood's activities and it's charismatic leader Jack Harkness" - "it's" should be "its", and link Jack
- done.
- Plot summary for "End of Days": briefly explain what the rift is, as it is the first time it has been mentioned. Unless it wasn't the rift after all that erased it from history...
- mentioned time reset and it being a space-time rift. Think that's all that's needed given that it doesn't relate to much else in the article.
- "Rhys becomes a main character in the third series of Torchwood, a five-part miniseries called Children of Earth airing in 2009." Add bolded word
- done
- "Series four, Miracle Day (2011) begins..." Comma after "(2011)"
- done
- "and also has a significant role in The Twilight Streets, (Released March 2008)..." The R in "released" should be lowercase
- done
- "...after the Torchwood Team fall are destroyed fighting..." Not sure what the word "fall" is doing there
- removed
- "Rhys makes an appearance in the Torchwood Radio Play..." Don't think "radio play" needs to be capitalized
- removed capitals and linked
- "With Gwen dead, and Jack missing Rhys is..." No comma after "dead"
- removed.
- "Rhys also appears in "The Devil and Miss Carew", (2011) an additional radio play, set between" comma after "(2011)" instead of the title; no comma after "play"
- fixed
- "and that his girlfriends job is nothing more unusual" - "girlfriends" should be "girlfriend's"
- heh, fixed
- The original intention of the writers had been for Rhys to die at the end of season one but Richard Stokes explains that it was overruled by show creator Russell T Davies" Comma after "season one", link RTD
- done
- "Actor Kai Owen attributes part of his character's success to his on screen rapport with actress Eve Myles." Hyphen in "on-screen"
- done
- "After reprisal from death Russell T Davies felt" - comma after "death"
- done
- Shorten "Russell T Davies" to "Davies" in the second paragraph of "Characterisation"
- done
- Stephen James Walker is linked twice in "Characterisation"
- delinked second occurance
- "opining that he, along with Barrowman, Myles and David Lloyd managed..." Isn't there a hyphen in "David-Lloyd"?
- yep
- "Speaking of the shows fourth series premiere" - "shows" should be "show's"
- fixed
- References: episode citation should have the "seriesno" and "number" parameters filled out. Also, clarify the titles of the credited people (writer, director, etc)
- added series/episode numbers and titles in brackets.
- Could the Torchwood Magazine refs be expanded with more parameters filled out?
- Google is a wonderful thing.
- Ref #49 and #71 need accessdates
- Put todays. (#48 and #70 since I took a redundant news article out of the series four plot section)
- Ref #72 needs a publisher
- Added. (#71)
- Disambiguation links
- Fixed.
- This warns that ref #74 will expire; might want to grab an archive.
- Included archived version
Putting on hold for 7 days. Pretty minor fixes though; you should be good to go soon! Glimmer721 talk 21:57, 9 May 2012 (UTC)
- Think I've taken care of everything bar the references, will double check and comment against each point after I get round to filling those out. Thank you for a very comprehensive review! Eshlare (talk) 22:49, 9 May 2012 (UTC)
- Update: Just fleshed out all the references where needed. Think everything else has been tackled. Let me know if there's anything I've missed. Thanks again for your time. Eshlare (talk) 00:37, 10 May 2012 (UTC)
- Looks like everything has been addressed. Passing! Glimmer721 talk 22:00, 10 May 2012 (UTC)
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