Talk:Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe/GA1

GA Review

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As a former contributor to this article I'm excited to see that it's finally coming up for GAN. My reviews tend to come in piece-by-piece, so if you see something added to the review, please feel free to fix it, even if I'm not done reviewing. Below you will see the standard GAN criteria, and then my comments below that as they are added.

Reviewer: Teancum (talk) 17:27, 10 August 2010 (UTC)

GA Criteria

GA review (see here for criteria)

1. It is reasonably well written.

   a (prose): b (MoS):

2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.

   a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):

3. It is broad in its coverage.

   a (major aspects): { b (focused):

4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.

   Fair representation without bias:

5. It is stable.

   No edit wars, etc.:

6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.

   a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

7. Overall:

   Pass/Fail:

Comments

Please bear with me. These are not structured, but are in list format. Feel free to just make an indent under each point as you fix an issue. If I approve of the fix I will use the strikeout strike tag to mark it as complete.

Quick-finds

• There is one disambig link
• File:MKvDC freefal.jpg is still a bit big. I would recommend resizing it to 500px wide or below
• The caption for Superman/Kano should probably be less about the image and more about something to do with the freefall kombat system, per WP:CAPTION. The Kollector's Edition image should probably mention a tiny bit about the Kollector's Edition as well. See The Beatles: Rock Band for a good example of captions. They don't have to be quite as long as the example article, but it gives you a good idea of what captions should be like.
• The publisher in a reference should only be wikilinked on the first reference that uses them (for instance, the first "GameRankings" would be linked, the second would not)

• I noticed you replaced some wikilinks in the refs with italics. Only publications that consider themselves magazines should be in italics. Check Template:VG reviews#Code (the right side) for quick reference on which ones are considered magazines

• Restate the title, or the abbreviated title, of the game more when leading a sentence. Right now it relies far too heavily on phrases like "The game..."
• I found at least one instance of "YOU". This and any others should be replaced.
• I see both Gamespot and GameSpot. Be sure all instances are GameSpot.
• Joystiq (ref 19) needs wikilinked, 20 should not. Similar instances with the GameRankings and Metacritic refs (39-42), wired.com (refs 50 and 59). Gamasutra should be wikilinked. Ref 55 has no publisher, which should be "United States Securities and Exchange Commission"

Fixed all of these errors Subzerosmokerain (talk) 22:43, 10 August 2010 (UTC)

• Crossed off repaired errors, added to the list --Teancum (talk) 00:24, 11 August 2010 (UTC)

• Finished these errors. Subzerosmokerain (talk) 21:56, 12 August 2010 (UTC)

• Section passed Y --Teancum (talk) 14:25, 13 August 2010 (UTC)

Lead

• The lead makes no mention of the game's story. It should have an abbreviated story (one paragraph) between the two existing lead paragraphs. Nothing major, four lines or so should do it.
• This was the last title to be developed and published by Midway Games, as it filed for Chapter 11 Bankruptcy and sold the rights to Mortal Kombat to Warner Bros. -- it's mentioned here, but nowhere else. Please add it (with a reference to back it up) somewhere in the development section

Mentioned the second part but I will pick up the lead tomorrow Subzerosmokerain (talk) 22:43, 10 August 2010 (UTC)

Took a shot at the lead, needs a bit more reworking (and movement) but it's there. Also, i've already taken care of teh second bullet, it can be striked out. Sincerely Subzerosmokerain (talk) 02:46, 12 August 2010 (UTC)

Lead's done. Subzerosmokerain (talk) 21:56, 12 August 2010 (UTC)

• Section passed Y --Teancum (talk) 14:25, 13 August 2010 (UTC)

Gameplay

• Replace the first two words ("The game") with MK vs DC
• The first sentence feels long and a bit of a run-on. See if you can break it up into two sentences.
• the characters see the characters from the opposite universe as the invaders of their own - remove the second "the", making it the characters see characters from the opposite universe
• Ed Boon did confirm that the player - the reader probably does not know who Ed Boon is. Mention his title and wikilink him. Also this sentence is confusing. I assume the reader is meant to know that because everyone is playable that some characters do not receive a full story arc?
• The players can fight in the air during the fall in a quasi-mini-game - wikilink mini game
• hit certain buttons to be on top -- add during the fall
• Another in-fight mode called "Rage mode" -- I would change in-fight mode to in-fight feature to avoid redundancy
• that fills every time you take damage or attack -- makes it sound like it fills instantly
• The effects of Rage mode causes -- remove The effects of

Did these suggestions and tried to fix confusing sentence Subzerosmokerain (talk) 22:43, 10 August 2010 (UTC)

• Good work, section passed Y --Teancum (talk) 00:24, 11 August 2010 (UTC)

Plot/Characters

• Cite the plot using quotes and the like from the game. See X-Men Legends for an example of how I recently updated that article. -not going to require this of you
• Superman is seen stopping -- can just be Superman stops. Try to avoid "-ing" type words if you can
• The plot definitely needs to be gone over once or twice more. Try to find ways to not use parenthesis, and see if you can break up the last paragraph into two. If it's possible to expand the plot without getting into WP:GAMECRUFT territory, please do. (but expansion is not a deal breaker here, so don't feel like you have to) I would definitely recommend taking the end of the game and breaking it out into a new paragraph as possible as a closing paragraph --doesn't need split into a closing paragraph, and otherwise is now fine
• Ed Boon has said that some of the characters' abilities - Boon can be unlinked, as he should be linked per the above
• especially on the DC side - needs a copy edit. Something like particularly those of the DC Universe -- also is "Universe", when referring to the universe in general and not the game, part of the title? If not all instanced should be lower case. If so, the opposite.
• Boon specifically mentioned that Superman - add For example,
• Boon revealed on the morning of July 7, 2009, via Twitter that two new characters were developed as downloadable content, Quan Chi from Mortal Kombat and Harley Quinn from DC Universe but had been scrapped. -- two sentences please. One for who was added, one for them being scrapped (and why). Scrapped should probably be replaced with a more professional word/phrase as well.

I fixed all writing issues but i'm still mulling over the "Universe" vs. "universe" spelling, if there are not that many instances, is it just assumed to be the Universe of the DC characters? Subzerosmokerain (talk) 22:45, 10 August 2010 (UTC)

I don't know that "Universe" is worth taking tons of time over. I'd say pick one and go with it. --Teancum (talk) 22:48, 10 August 2010 (UTC)

Plot will take some time, might not be able to get to it until Saturday, hopefully done tomorrow. Subzerosmokerain (talk) 21:56, 12 August 2010 (UTC)

• Went ahead and covered the plot for you. section passed Y --Teancum (talk) 14:25, 13 August 2010 (UTC)

Development

• This eighth Mortal Kombat game was supposed to be "dark, gritty, serious" -- try using would have been instead of was supposed to be
• remained was the use of the Unreal Engine 3, the one used in Gears of War. -- replace the one with also
• DC Universe thus got restricted to a "Teen" rating -- replace got with was
• ...Sub-Zero's "Spine Rip" from previous titles have been replaced due to how violent they were. -- might flow better as ...Sub-Zero's "Spine Rip" from previous titles were replaced due to their violent nature
• The last paragraph as a mix of past and present tense. The first part makes it clear that the DLC was dropped due to Midway's troubles, the second half talks about potential DLC. I don't think the second half needs pulled, just restructured.

Fixed grammar issue and moved potential DLC characters to Character section, as it seemed more appropriate. Subzerosmokerain (talk) 21:56, 12 August 2010 (UTC)

• section passed Y --Teancum (talk) 14:25, 13 August 2010 (UTC)

Reception

• There is no mention of what the "Kollector's Edition" contains, though there is an image, and one brief mention of the sales. I would recommend adding information on the Kollector's Edition, renaming "Development" to "Development and marketing", then placing both the image and the info about the Kollector's edition in that section.
• Use a <br /> tag in the Reception infobox to put the other platform on a second line. Also to keep in line with the rest of the article, the PS3 version should be first.
• Replace all instances of "Game Rankings" with "GameRankings" (no space)
• Why is Well-Done wikilinked?
• ABC News praised Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe's story stating that "MKvsDC [did] a great job of giving players a cohesive..." -- the latter half would likely flow better if it was stating that it did "a great job of giving players a cohesive..."
• The COO of GameStop ' -- wikilink COO to Chief operating officer

Finished these suggestions and added Kollector's edition information inside the image caption. It might be enough for the article itself but i'll do try to add to the prose tomorrow if I have time. Subzerosmokerain (talk) 22:43, 10 August 2010 (UTC)

Kollector's edition info. might be redundant in image caption and text, but I will be adding it to prose tomorrow.Subzerosmokerain (talk) 21:56, 12 August 2010 (UTC)

• section passed Y --Teancum (talk) 14:25, 13 August 2010 (UTC)

More to come --Teancum (talk) 18:08, 10 August 2010 (UTC)

I'm done combing through the article. Once the remaining issues are fixed this can be passed. --Teancum (talk) 12:10, 11 August 2010 (UTC)

VERDICT - Pass Y Nice work on this one. Congrats on the GA. I will try to get everything updated shortly to reflect it. --Teancum (talk) 14:25, 13 August 2010 (UTC)