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Latest comment: 2 years ago1 comment1 person in discussion
Hey @RomanDeckert:, fair play for writing this article, she's clearly a very worthy candidate for one, an exceptional woman no doubt about it. The article itself could do with some more work before it's ready for review in my opinion, I found it confusing in places and and a bit messy. I've done some copyediting as far as "between the world wars", but I'm going to stop for now at least.
A few thoughts:
Why isn't this article called Renée-Marguerite Frick-Cramer? Is there evidence that she stopped using that name anywhere?
Personally, I would change "between the world wars" to "the interwar period", but I'm not overly passionate either way.
On the Topic of quotes, you have lots of long ones - are they all necessary? See WP:OVERQUOTING. Also, only use block quotation for quotes of roughly 40 words or more.
There are a lot of red-linked articles in this article, particularly detailing her family. Are they all deserving of a wiki page in their own right? (maybe they are, I have no idea)
Some of the captions on the images are a bit vague. Specify which museum her statement is found in, and explain the street sign bit under the picture too. "Portrayed" isn't doesn't mean "made a portrait of". Also, I know right side photographs are usually preferred on Wikipedia, but I think in this case a few could be moved to the left.
I'm afraid I'm going to have to quickfail this as the article is far from meeting several of the criteria. Comments were made on the talkpage in September about how to improve the article and to build on them, I'll leave some suggestions here. I have no doubt that with a bit of work it can be a GA in the future.
The lead: per MOS:LEAD the lead section should summarize what comes below and doesn't need citations since the info will be cited below instead; per MOS:LEADLENGTH should be two pararaphs; make redirect from Renée-Marguerite Cramer
The article needs a copy edit for example a picture caption reads "Another portray by Fred Boissonnas, apparently from 1942" and "After losing control of the major public offices in Geneva, his Patrician class[clarification needed] turned to banking and philanthropic activities at the end of the 19th century," ends on a comma.
The sentence above is way too close to the source which reads "Her family belonged to the local bourgeoisie, the social class that had turned to banking and philanthropic activities at the end of the 19th century, after losing control of the major public offices in Geneva"
Further that source gives a 77 per cent match on earwig which is way to high, even with the quotations.
Further (and as already suggested on the talkpage) the blockquotes are incorrectly formatted and would be better off merged into the text
The selected works section is too big and should not have external links in it. Purge the links and keep maybe three of her better known works.
All the "clarification needed" tags need to be dealt with
As a last comment, the writing needs work to make it flow rather than being a collection of sentences. It would help perhaps to read some other GAs about women to see how this article can be improved. Good luck with it and let me know if something doesn't make sense. Mujinga (talk) 10:34, 3 January 2022 (UTC)Reply