Talk:June (magazine)/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Alexandra IDV (talk · contribs) 04:28, 10 January 2023 (UTC)

I'll take a look at this!--Alexandra^IDV 04:28, 10 January 2023 (UTC)

Lead and infobox

• Great call to include IPA here.

History

• Do we want to specify that bishounen is about androgynous beauty, or is it implicit enough in the current wording? Leaving this up to you.
  • Clarified this by adding the literal translation of bishōnen to this section.
• which Sagawa belonged when "belonged to" or "to which", right?
  • Fixed.
• Accidental space between ref 18 and note d.
  • Fixed.

Publishing

• I know that you already translate "tanbi" in the lead, but I think it might be helpful to do so again here where it's discussed for the first time in the article body, since it's been a while - it's not a word we can expect enwp readers to be familiar with.
  • Done.
• Sagawa specifically the bishōnen is missing a word or two.
  • Clarified.
• Would be nice to (briefly) give context for who Schodt is.
  • Done.
• Curious about the use of "bodies" in "advertisements featuring male bodies" - is the takeaway that these were objectifying and showed the models "as bodies" rather than "as men"?
  • Clarified.
• Unsure if "June-kei" needs a translation (I don't think "kei" is widely understood by English-speakers) or if it's clear enough from context
  • Clarified this and moved it to "Impact", where I think it makes more sense to include.
• Each of Takemiya's covers contain - either change to "contains" or remove "Each of" to make the subject plural
  • Done.

Regular sections

• You both refer to the sections using the original titles ("Shōsetsu Dojo") and translations ("Kēko-tan's Drawing School") - I would keep it consistent and refer to them with the original titles (while also providing a translation on the first mention)
• Per MOS:NOITALIC, the section titles should be written unitalicized and within quotation marks.
• Was "Secret Series" rendered like so, in roumaji? If so, that's fine - it just stuck out to me as the one section title only given in English, so I had to ask.
  • Buckley 1991 only refers to the section as "Secret Series" and does not indicate any roumaji or Japanese script. I'm not certain if that means that was the original Japanese title of the section, or if it's Buckley's own translation. How should we proceed on these three notes re: maintaining consistency in titling the sections?
    • @Morgan695: So I did a lot of googling, and eventually found it - the original title is "Secret Bunko" (シークレット文庫, Shīkuretto Bunko, "Secret Book Collection"). This was way more difficult to find than I had anticipated, as it turns out there's basically nothing online covering it using its actual title, but I figured that this seems like the sort of thing that would be advertised on the cover - so I looked at June covers from the late 80s and early 90s, and found it mentioned here. If you want a source for the title, I would simply cite that issue's cover art and be done with it.--Alexandra^IDV 05:15, 11 January 2023 (UTC)
      • @Alexandra IDV: Great, thanks for your conscientiousness in looking into this. I've revised the section now, but I don't think it's necessary to specifically source "Secret Bunko". Morgan695 (talk) 05:50, 11 January 2023 (UTC)
• Uncertain about how you in "Shōsetsu Dojo" indicate the long vowel in "Shousetsu" but don't in "Doujou". I agree with rendering it as "Dojo" in the translation "Novel Dojo", as that's how the loanword commonly is spelled, but the inconsistent treatment within the Japanese title looks very strange to me.
  • Done.

Audience and circulation

• an audience of women in their late teens to early twenties and many of whom began reading June as young women and continued doing so into adulthood. strike me as odd in how "women" here is used for people described as not yet adult. I wouldn't call someone who's not an adult a woman - I would call them a girl. Would consider rewording as something like "a female audience ranging from their late teens to early twenties" and "many of whom began reading June as teenagers and [...]".
  • Clarified.

Impact

• English language manga publisher Digital Manga launched its yaoi imprint "June", named in reference to the magazine. - this isn't actually supported by the reference, which claims that the imprint was named after Jean Genet.
  • Couldn't find a source directly confirming the connection, so I've removed it.

Images

• Everything seems in order
• Not part of GA criteria, but would be nice to add brief, descriptive alt text to the images for readers with impaired vision - particularly for the cover art in the infobox.
  • Done.

Sources

• I can't access the print sources (and suspect my Japanese isn't good enough to read them) and will just assume good faith on their use.
• The red link ICV2 should point to ICv2.
  • Done.
• Not part of the GA criteria, but I would highly recommend adding archive links to all online sources, and marking all Japanese-language sources as being in Japanese.
  • Done.

Looks good overall! I'm putting this on hold for seven days - please notify me when you have addressed the above or if you have any questions.--Alexandra^IDV 05:57, 10 January 2023 (UTC)

Thanks for taking up the review so quickly; I'll respond to your notes in the coming days. Morgan695 (talk) 06:04, 10 January 2023 (UTC)

@Alexandra IDV: Hi, response above. Flagging my note under 'Regular sections' as requiring follow-up. Morgan695 (talk) 18:54, 10 January 2023 (UTC)

@Morgan695: Thank you for your edits and responses! I will go ahead and promote this to GA now.--Alexandra^IDV 06:01, 11 January 2023 (UTC)