Terms like secret dating, private dating or secret romance refer to the concept of dating or romance between people who wish keep it private from others they might otherwise normally inform.[1] It often overlaps with concepts like forbidden love (such as in affairs or disputes between families). It is presented in titles such as Secret Love.

Reasons for secret dating

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Sexual orientation (LGBT)

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Homosexuality and LGBT identity is a taboo in some regions of the world, including in most of Africa and Asia.[2] It is therefore, not difficult to see people involved in secret dating with same sex partners in those regions of the world. A historian, Daniel Rivers threw light on how gay parents were in constant fear in the early '70s and '80s of losing their children, in his book, Radical Relations: Lesbian Mothers, Gay Fathers, and Their Children in the United States since World War II.[3][4][5]

Older women looking for young men

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One of the factors that make people resort to secret dating is their age. Some women prefer to date younger men in their twenties. Because this is not a norm in their society, they may experiment with distance relationships.[6]

Disadvantages of secret dating

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A major disadvantage of secret dating is the risk of being scammed. Since the relationship is kept private, the individuals involved tend to keep details confidential. Detecting fraudulent behavior from the other party may take considerable time in such cases. In contrast, in more open relationships, individuals, especially women, often share relationship details with others. Majority of private dating take place on the internet.[7] With the advent of the online solutions like Tinder and Badoo, scamming and manipulations between the parties have increased. The disadvantages of this type of dating now include stalking and constant need of personal possession.[8]

Examples

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Cheating

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Family disapproval

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Other

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See also

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References

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  1. ^ Rudder, Christian (2014-09-28). "Seven secrets of dating from the experts at OkCupid". The Guardian.
  2. ^ "Obama Fights Nigerian Anti-Gay Bill, Threatens To Cut Off Aid". Forbes (USA). 11 September 2011. Retrieved 7 May 2018.
  3. ^ Rivers, Daniel Winunwe (2013-09-03). Radical Relations: Lesbian Mothers, Gay Fathers, and Their Children in the United States since World War II. UNC Press Books. ISBN 978-1-4696-0719-1.
  4. ^ L. Patrick, Wendy (2019-03-07). "The Truth About Secret Relationships". psychologytoday. Retrieved 2024-01-15.
  5. ^ "How Growing Up With A Mom In A Secret Lesbian Relationship Shaped My Life". HuffingtonPost (USA). 15 March 2018. Retrieved 7 May 2018.
  6. ^ "Cougar World". Forbes (India). 2009-09-29. Retrieved 2018-05-07.
  7. ^ Boudreau, Abbie (2018-07-19). "Dating Scams Flourish Online". CNN. Retrieved 2018-05-07.
  8. ^ "How to be better at online dating, according to psychology". NBC. 2019-03-16. Retrieved 2019-11-11.