Talk:Tropical Storm Irving (1992)
Latest comment: 5 years ago by Yellow Evan in topic GA Review
Tropical Storm Irving (1992) has been listed as one of the Natural sciences good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it. Review: April 28, 2019. (Reviewed version). |
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- This review is transcluded from Talk:Tropical Storm Irving (1992)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contribs) 22:09, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
Lede
edit- "A distinct but weak low-pressure area developed within the Western Pacific monsoon trough." - Link low-pressure area.
- "After tracking north, Irving turned to the northeast, and attained peak intensity a day later." - The track map shows it started off west-northwest and then curved generally to the north as opposed to north and then northeast.
- Better? YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
- "In response to a subtropical ridge to the north," - Link subtropical ridge
- "Tropical Storm Irving was the first of two successive systems to move over the Japanese archipelago" - What was the other?
- I mention that later in the impact. YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
- "Two people were reported missing in Wakayama prefecture. A swimmer was reported missing and two other people were killed offshore Kyōtango due to high waves" - That's two dead, three missing; the infobox says two missing.
- Sigh, this is a serious mishap I make on way too many GANs. YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
- "Overall, 51 flights linking Osaka and Shikoku were cancelled and ferry services between the Kansai region and Shikoku were also suspended." - Comma after cancelled.
- Seeing "and" is mentioned a few times, changed one to "while". YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
MH
edit- A hurricane hunter aircraft investigated the system, and discovered that the low-level circulation was 220 km (135 mi) further north than what was inferred from the satellite data." - No comma.
- Removed. YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
- "Meanwhile, the JTWC upgraded the depression into Tropical Storm Irving,[6] based on an increase in atmospheric convection near the center and Dvorak satellite estimates.[1]" - How about "Meanwhile, the JTWC upgraded the depression to Tropical Storm Irving based on an increase of both convection and Dvorak satellite estimates"?
- Changes the meaning however. YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
- "After tracking north-northeast, Irving then turned northeast.[7] On the morning of August 3, the JMA upgraded Irving into a severe tropical storm.[5] According to the JTWC, Irving attained typhoon intensity that evening.[6] At the same time, the JMA estimated that Irving attained its peak intensity of 105 km/h (65 mph) and a barometric pressure of 980 mbar (28.94 inHg).[2] According to the JTWC, Irving continued to intensify and contrary to forecasts, attained a peak intensity of 145 km/h (90 mph) at 00:00 UTC on August 4, in agreement with surface observations." - Every one of these sentences refer to the storm as Irving. Let's alternate with "the storm/system/cyclone/etc." We also need a comma after "continued to intensify and"
- Changed and re-worded the last bit because that would have been a lot of commas. YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
- "However, this period of intensification was not observed during real time by the JTWC; operationally the JTWC estimated maximum winds of 105 km/h (65 mph), based on Dvorak intensity estimates." - Alternate JTWC with "the organization" or something similar; we need a comma after "operationally" too.
- "The JTWC and JMA downgraded Irving to a tropical storm on August 4[5] as it interacted with land.[1]" - Correct me if I'm wrong, but links in the middle of the sentence are generally discouraged, especially since in this instance it can just be moved to the period.
- There's literally no rules (as of last look) on the books regarding this but this always seems to trigger you :P YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
Impact
edit- "A peak rainfall total occurred of 519 mm (20.4 in) at Nagaoka District." - Move "occurred" after the rainfall total.
- " Damage was estimated at ¥514 million, ¥447 million of which was due to 2,055 ha (5,080 acres) of crop damage." - Let's move "of which" before the second damage estimate so those two numbers aren't so close together.
- "Strong winds also downed many trees and all transport in the prefecture was halted." - Comma after "trees."
- "Ten ferries were cancelled in Fukuoka Prefecture .[17]" - Delete the random space before the period.
- "Roads were damaged in 17 spots in Wakayama prefecture,[18] where two people were rendered missing due to rough seas." - Rendered missing sounds weird. Let's go with the conventional reported missing.
- I use both but ok. YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
- "A swimmer was reported missing[21]and two other individuals were killed offshore Kyōtango due to high waves." - Same as above with the reference in the middle of the sentence.
See also
edit- "Tropical Storm Harry (1991) - similar early-season Japan-hitting typhoon" - Harry wasn't a typhoon and "Japan-hitting" sounds weird.
- Better? YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
References
edit- Reference 5 is dead.
- Ugh, fixed. YE Pacific Hurricane 23:14, 28 April 2019 (UTC)
That's about it. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contributions) 22:09, 28 April 2019 (UTC)