Talk:Jonathon Band

Edit

This article was a little stub. Have added about 16 references and expanded the article lots. LordHarris 23:18, 8 March 2007 (UTC)

GA on hold

I have reviewed this article according to the GA criteria. There are a few things that should be fixed before I'll pass it as a GA.

• Each image is under fair use, so they should probably be reuploaded as a smaller size to continue to qualify as fair use. Image:JonathonBand3.jpg is really large, and definitely should be scaled down. I know that any U.S. military pictures of them performing in service are free images, but does that qualify for the UK? If so, then it would allow the images to remain their current size.

Unfortunately images are not free like in the US and the government retains copyright of any images produced within it. However under current crown copyright, any images that are displayed to the publicmay be reproduced free of charge in any format or medium provided it is reproduced accurately and not used in a misleading context. Therefore images do not need to be changed to low resolution.

• Combine "He has held the position since 2005." and "Since becoming First Sea Lord, he has been a firm advocate of the creation of new ships to meet new threats and maintain the status of the Royal Navy as one of the worlds leading naval forces." Perhaps "Since becoming First Sea Lord in 2005, he has been a firm advocate of the creation of new ships to meet new threats and maintain the status of the Royal Navy as one of the worlds leading naval forces."

Combined and changed to above suggestion.

• In the Early life and education section, where was he born at? It mentions that he lives abroad, but what locations? If you can, include his parents' names. Also, combine "He entered the Royal Navy in 1967. He was then educated at Haileybury before undertaking sea training in the Far East." Several sentences in the section start with "He", change it up a little for some more variety.

Changes made.

• Fix the link for USS Belknap, it currently goes to a dab page.

Link corrected.

• "The Belknap, a guided missile cruiser is now no longer in service." This sentence needs to be reworded or another comma added.

Corrected as suggested.

• There are wikilinks for individual years in this section, but none in the prior sections. Either wikilink all of those, or remove the ones here.

a few wikilinks to years added.

• "Commander in 1983, he assumed command of the frigate HMS Phoebe, operating in the NATO area, at the time of the RN’s first operational experience with surface ship towed passive sonar." This sentence should either be reworded or broke up into two sentences.

New sentance and reworded.

• Change the wikilink for commander to Commander#Royal Navy. Rear admiral should also be modified in the same way.

Links changed.

• Add a wikilink for knighted, some readers may not know what this is referring to.

Link added.

• "In 2003 he spoke out for the crew of the HMS Turbulent and the efforts to be the longest ever deployed submarine." This sentence should be reworded, it doesn't really make too much sense. Is it supposed to be "Turbulent in their efforts"?

reworded to make clearer - their efforts.

• For the inline citations, they go directly after the punctuation. Also, all of the inline citations should be reformatted using the citation templates found at Wikipedia:Citation templates instead of just having the url. This makes it easier for the readers to search the sources.

This is the only point with which I disagree with you. Under current WP:WIAGA criteria inline citations are not neccessary for GA. The criteria states that they are preferable for longer articles but are not required. Inline citation templates are a matter of personal or article preference - Wikipedia:Citation templates and they are not required by WP:CITE and are neither encouraged nor discouraged by any other Wikipedia citation guidelines.. Please feel free to change them yourself but it is not GA necessary.

• "Upon taking up the post of First Sea Lord he became the professional head of the Royal Navy. He is also Chief of Naval Staff." Combine the two sentences and include a wikilink for Chief of Naval Staff.

Sentances combined. Note that Chief of Naval Staff actually redirects to this article.

• "Band is a proponent of Sustained Surface Combatant Capability and the creation of new ships to maintain the Royal Navy as one of the worlds leading navies." Change to "Band is a proponent for the Sustained Surface Combatant Capability and the creation of new ships to maintain the Royal Navy as one of the world's leading navies."

Changed.

• Add wikilink for aircraft carrier.

Link added.

• "He also met with on the following day, the President of Sri Lanka Mahinda Rajapaksa." Change to "On the following day, he also met with the President..."

Changed

• "The event will be known as Operation Corporate and will be led by the current First Sea Lord." This doesn't make sense, isn't he the current First Sea Lord? Change to "...and will be led by Band."

He might not be the first sea lord then, have added at the time to make clear.

• Add wikilink for £1bn.

Done.

• Daily Telegraph should be italicized.

Done.

• "He threatened to resign as head of the Navy if the Government failed to agree to pay for two new aircraft carriers - the Royal Navy CVF programme, it has promised." Change to "it had previously promised".

Done.

• In the succession template at the bottom of the page, it says that he became First Sea Lord in 2006 but in the intro it was 2005. Change to the correct year. Also his current rank in his infobox says admiral. Is this equivalent to First Sea Lord, or should that be changed as well?

Date error changed. His Rank is Admiral. His position is First Sea Lord.

Most of the above suggestions should be relatively easy to fix, but the reformatting of the inline citations may take some time. I will leave the article on hold for seven days, and will pass it if everything is fixed. Please let me know when you are done or if you have any questions on my talk page and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. --Nehrams2020 20:22, 30 April 2007 (UTC)

I have enacted your suggestions and corrected. I have not attempted to reformat inline citations with templates as this is not neccessary for GA of smaller articles.LordHarris 21:19, 30 April 2007 (UTC)

Just a few more things

Good job addressing these issues so quickly, but I just have a few more things that should be addressed.

• The intro should still have the two sentences combined and there should be an apostrophe within "world's".

I have combined the two sentances and added an apostrophe. Hope that reads ok?

• Were you able to find any information on birth location, the abroad locations, parents?

Unfortunately no. I have tried several internet searches with lots of different terms and had a good search on the RN website but nothing. Because he is the current first sea lord there is no publication, e.g. biography books etc mentioning him. The only suggestion that I could think of to get this sort of information would be to email the Royal Navy or MOD public information departments - though its unlikely that they would know or if they did, would care to pass on such information. Perhaps in the future new information will become available or someone with a personal relationship will be able to expand.

• "In the mid 1970s, he undertook an exchange program with the United States Navy and served onboard the USS Belknap. The Belknap, a guided missile cruiser, which is now no longer in service." These sentences could be combined into something like "In the mid 1970s, he undertook an exchange program with the United States Navy and served onboard the guided missile cruiser, USS Belknap, which is now no longer in service." If you don't want to combine, then leave it as is but remove "which".

Combined as suggested.

• "In 2003 he spoke out for the crew of the HMS Turbulent and their efforts at being the longest ever deployed submarine." This still sounds a little off, I think it needs more detail near the end, maybe "...Turbulent for their efforts on serving for the longest deployment on the submarine."

I have reworded, hopefully this is now more clear?

• I agree that you don't need to reformat the inline citations into templates, but the space still should be remove between punctuation and the inline citations. There are a few cases that I can still see.

I have removed several gaps/spaces between the punctuation/full stops and the citations - hopefully this is now ok.

• "Upon taking up the post of First Sea Lord he became the professional head of the Royal Navy. and Chief of Naval Staff." This needs to be fixed still, remove the period and then include "and later Chief...".

I have reworded into the following:

In February 2006 Band took over the position's of First Sea Lord and Chief of Naval Stafffrom Admiral Sir Alan West and in a press statement set out his out the Navy's priorities in the 21st century. Upon taking up the post of First Sea Lord he became the professional head of the Royal Navy. - is this better?

Again, you're almost there, just fix these last few things and I'll pass it. --Nehrams2020 22:39, 30 April 2007 (UTC)

I believe I have fixed those few things and explained about the lack of detail on parents etc. LordHarris 23:13, 30 April 2007 (UTC)

GA passed

I have passed this article as a GA according to the GA criteria. Good work on completing all of these in one day. It is unfortunate that some of these candidates take so long to be reviewed. There were a few more spacing issues with the inline citations, but I took care of them. Sorry for being so picky, just want this article to be the best it can be for good article status. Continue to improve the article as you get new sources and help keep the article to its high standards. Keep up the good work, and I hope you continue to improve the quality of articles on Wikipedia! --Nehrams2020 01:33, 1 May 2007 (UTC)

Fair use rationale for Image:Jonathanband2.jpg

Image:Jonathanband2.jpg is being used on this article. I notice the image page specifies that the image is being used under fair use but there is no explanation or rationale as to why its use in this Wikipedia article constitutes fair use. In addition to the boilerplate fair use template, you must also write out on the image description page a specific explanation or rationale for why using this image in each article is consistent with fair use.

Please go to the image description page and edit it to include a fair use rationale. Using one of the templates at Wikipedia:Fair use rationale guideline is an easy way to insure that your image is in compliance with Wikipedia policy, but remember that you must complete the template. Do not simply insert a blank template on an image page.

If there is other fair use media, consider checking that you have specified the fair use rationale on the other images used on this page. Note that any fair use images uploaded after 4 May, 2006, and lacking such an explanation will be deleted one week after they have been uploaded, as described on criteria for speedy deletion. If you have any questions please ask them at the Media copyright questions page. Thank you.

BetacommandBot 03:11, 1 October 2007 (UTC)

Fair use rationale for Image:JonathonBand3.jpg

Image:JonathonBand3.jpg is being used on this article. I notice the image page specifies that the image is being used under fair use but there is no explanation or rationale as to why its use in this Wikipedia article constitutes fair use. In addition to the boilerplate fair use template, you must also write out on the image description page a specific explanation or rationale for why using this image in each article is consistent with fair use.

Please go to the image description page and edit it to include a fair use rationale. Using one of the templates at Wikipedia:Fair use rationale guideline is an easy way to insure that your image is in compliance with Wikipedia policy, but remember that you must complete the template. Do not simply insert a blank template on an image page.

If there is other fair use media, consider checking that you have specified the fair use rationale on the other images used on this page. Note that any fair use images uploaded after 4 May, 2006, and lacking such an explanation will be deleted one week after they have been uploaded, as described on criteria for speedy deletion. If you have any questions please ask them at the Media copyright questions page. Thank you.

BetacommandBot 03:14, 1 October 2007 (UTC)

GA Sweeps (Pass)

Jonathon Band has been reviewed as part of Wikipedia:WikiProject Good articles/Project quality task force. As mentioned in Nehrams2020's review above, the references could be formatted using the templates on WP:CITET, but at present this is a (strong) preference rather than a strict criterion (mainly from the perspective of including retrieval dates for web pages). However, I believe the article currently meets the criteria and should remain listed as a Good article. The article history has been updated to reflect this review. Regards, EyeSerene^TALK 10:49, 10 October 2007 (UTC)

Fair use rationale for Image:Jonathanband2.jpg

Image:Jonathanband2.jpg is being used on this article. I notice the image page specifies that the image is being used under fair use but there is no explanation or rationale as to why its use in this Wikipedia article constitutes fair use. In addition to the boilerplate fair use template, you must also write out on the image description page a specific explanation or rationale for why using this image in each article is consistent with fair use.

Please go to the image description page and edit it to include a fair use rationale. Using one of the templates at Wikipedia:Fair use rationale guideline is an easy way to insure that your image is in compliance with Wikipedia policy, but remember that you must complete the template. Do not simply insert a blank template on an image page.

If there is other fair use media, consider checking that you have specified the fair use rationale on the other images used on this page. Note that any fair use images uploaded after 4 May, 2006, and lacking such an explanation will be deleted one week after they have been uploaded, as described on criteria for speedy deletion. If you have any questions please ask them at the Media copyright questions page. Thank you.

BetacommandBot 01:10, 7 November 2007 (UTC)

Fair use rationale for Image:JonathonBand3.jpg

Image:JonathonBand3.jpg is being used on this article. I notice the image page specifies that the image is being used under fair use but there is no explanation or rationale as to why its use in this Wikipedia article constitutes fair use. In addition to the boilerplate fair use template, you must also write out on the image description page a specific explanation or rationale for why using this image in each article is consistent with fair use.

Please go to the image description page and edit it to include a fair use rationale. Using one of the templates at Wikipedia:Fair use rationale guideline is an easy way to insure that your image is in compliance with Wikipedia policy, but remember that you must complete the template. Do not simply insert a blank template on an image page.

If there is other fair use media, consider checking that you have specified the fair use rationale on the other images used on this page. Note that any fair use images uploaded after 4 May, 2006, and lacking such an explanation will be deleted one week after they have been uploaded, as described on criteria for speedy deletion. If you have any questions please ask them at the Media copyright questions page. Thank you.

BetacommandBot 01:13, 7 November 2007 (UTC)

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