Talk:Animal House/GA1

GA Review

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Although the latter aspects of the article look pretty good-to-go, some of the issues highlighted in the previous GA attempt have not been rectified and some tweaks are needed.

• Images: all fine, except the filmset one is a pretty huge 2.18MB in size, can it be reduced to a more realistic size please?
• Lead: Fine again, except two brackets which clutter it slightly, the first can be removed by using a comma, the second: "Produced on a small ($2.7 million) budget" can just as easily read "Produced on a small budget of $2.7 million" which flows better.

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

• Some of the paragraphs in the plot summary are very short, would you consider merging a few?

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

• Plot has some very laid-back terms and opinionated wording. Examples: "They meet John "Bluto" Blutarsky (John Belushi), outside taking a leak", which is hardly an appropriate way to describe someone urinating, and what was he urinating against? "trying to kick the Deltas off campus" again is too casual. "triggers a wild food fight" sounds like something from a review, perhaps instead describe the cafeteria becoming engulfed or whatever happened. "and unwisely go to a roadhouse" their actions need describing rather than judging.

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 15:31, 10 October 2008 (UTC)

• Also with plot, although the plot has now been cut down to just over 800 words (great), I get the impression that it hasn't been paid close scrutiny - Otis Day and the Knights hasn't been wikilinked, some of the frat terminology goes right over my head, what's a Rush Week when it's at home? I'd suggest taking a long hard look at this section or getting another member of the film project to give it a proof read.

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 15:31, 10 October 2008 (UTC)

• The cast list does not follow MOS:FILM, ie "ACTOR as CHARACTER". "(the nickname suggests a sleek player)" Says who? Does it even need saying?

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

• "At the time, he was a big star thanks to Saturday Night Live and ended up doing the show while shooting the movie, spending Monday through Wednesday making it and then flying back to New York City to do the show on Thursday through Saturday.[3]" I'd sooner this worded more along the lines of him being committed to appear on Saturday Night Live and him spending X days at the film set and X days shooting SNL, particularly the removal of 'big star'.

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

• "who was encouraged by younger, slightly hipper executives" that reads like it's trying to be funny, could you word that more appropriately please? Does the introduction really just hinge around the age gap or had one of these younger executives heard about the project or knew some of the cast or crew?

Fixed. The age gap is relevant so I tweaked it to say that the execs were more receptive to the Lampoon style of humor.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

• "It was the sad state of the house that probably made it attractive as the chapter house for a degenerate fraternity." Is a source saying that or is it just personal opinion?

Removed.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

• "The soundtrack is a mix of rock and roll and R&B, mostly of songs that were popular around the approximate time period in which the film is set." This was brought up last time, the relevant bit would go better with the start of the original music composer's information.

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

• "but Universal nixed it because the sequel to American Graffiti (More American Graffiti), which had a few hippie-1967 sequences, had not done well. When John Belushi died, the idea died along with him.[24]" I'm not sure 'nixed' is the best term. The 'idea' isn't a living thing so can't 'die', a little rewording please?

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

• "Rick Meyerowitz, the illustrator who drew Animal House's iconic poster." is still in there, brought up during previous GAN.

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

I'm still reading through the article for now. Someoneanother 17:12, 8 October 2008 (UTC)

Thanks for these suggestions. I've fixed most and will work on the others soon.--J.D. (talk) 15:24, 9 October 2008 (UTC)

• Link #27 isn't pointing to an article any more.
• There are two #16 links, needs fixing.

These seem OK. As for #27, you have to scroll down the page to 1978 and see that the film is listed.--J.D. (talk) 15:34, 10 October 2008 (UTC)

I need to go over the external links and all the wikilinks again, some wikilinks are pointing at disambiguation pages and the external links need scrutinising again. The article is now on hold, but some other things may pop up in the meantime. Someoneanother 21:22, 8 October 2008 (UTC)

That's some really nice work you're doing, when I get around to it (a little tired right now) I'll check each external and internal link. Just clicked reference #2 and it came up 'not found', but the article is still there in EW, just at a different location (thank god). It's just as well, never seen source cross-referenced 25 times before. 0.0 Someoneanother 01:27, 10 October 2008 (UTC)

Phew, checked all internal and external links and they're working fine, you're practically there. There's a couple more things:

• The image issue remains, which I appreciate you already know, but I wanted to draw a line under the above and just look at what's left.

I don't have permission to edit this picture down to a much smaller size so it has been moved to the Discussion page and I can get the owner of it to resize it.--J.D. (talk) 17:53, 10 October 2008 (UTC)

• Some of the external links are already featured in the infobox, it won't stop the article from passing but would you consider this excessive or not?

I removed the official site link but the others (IMDB, AllMovie) are listed as acceptable links under the WikiProject Films Style page so I'll leave 'em there for now.--J.D. (talk) 17:53, 10 October 2008 (UTC)

• Refs #22 and #23 aren't in cite web format, or at least split into title and publisher, hardly a big deal but they look a little bare compared to the others.

Fixed.--J.D. (talk) 17:53, 10 October 2008 (UTC)

• Is there any reception information available for the soundtrack? I was looking at the 'wikiproject albums - stub' tag and thinking "hmm..". The article can pass without it, but considering how well documented the film is here it seems a shame not to have that info if it's lying around in sources on the net.

I looked and there really isn't. I did add a couple more citations as it was kinda lacking in that department.--J.D. (talk) 17:53, 10 October 2008 (UTC)

That's it. Someoneanother 16:56, 10 October 2008 (UTC)

You've approached the task with vim and been very cooperative, which is appreciated, resulting in a culturally significant film being a Good Article. Thank you and congratulations, Animal House has passed. Someoneanother 18:25, 10 October 2008 (UTC)